Category Archives: Principal

Five Life Changes for a First-Year Principal 

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First-Year Principal

Did you get the job? Yes! You did it! Congratulations, because you now have your first principal contract. You’re happy, your family is happy, and your checkbook is happier. The new position is everything you worked hard for, but life as you know it is about to change. The intent is not to scare you but to give an honest view. Here are a few life changes for a first-year principal.

Being a school principal is a noble job and comes with significant responsibilities. It comes with successes, but also comes with struggles. The first one or two years are the most difficult because you’re getting the lay of the land. The struggles vary for each person depending on their previous experience.

If your previous experience includes time as an assistant principal, you have a bird’s eye view of the leadership role. You may have leadership experience, but you’re coming from another district where things are done differently or policies are different. Or, you may be a first-year principal coming straight from a classroom environment. All journeys to the principal’s office are not the same. 

Personal and Professional Struggles

A first-year principal will experience both professional and personal changes. Early on, I recognized that the school principal’s job was lonely. I had many struggles, and you will, too. It’s normal to begin a new job, but the first few months may be bumpy. 

At times, you will question your decision to accept the job. As a first-year principal, I often asked myself two questions, “Why am I here?” and “What just happened?” You’ll question your leadership, decisions, skills, knowledge, and intuition. 

Other times, you will recognize how little time you have for your personal life. My social life was almost nonexistent during my first year in the role. Long hours at work and driving home in rush hour traffic exhausted me. Then, there were after-school and extracurricular activities that had to be attended by an administrator—some of the activities ended after 7:00 pm or 8:00 p.m. 

Twelve—or 13-hour days are not unusual. Many principals and assistant principals discuss their regret for missing their children’s events. First-year principals, the struggle between work and life balance is a huge life change. 

Physical and Emotional Wellness

Sleep is a fantasy

Another life change is you will never sleep like a baby again. According to the National Sleep Foundation, the average adult needs at least seven hours of sleep each night. However, the average American gets 5.7 hours per night. 

With the stress of the principal role, a whole night of sleep is now a fantasy. The job is now in control of your mind. While everyone else snores in your house, your eyes are wide open. The projects, reports, meetings, emails, and other work-related stuff are on your mind.

 Ideas, plans, and changes run through your mind’s eye.  The clock keeps ticking: one o’clock, two o’clock, and three o’clock. Finally, you fall asleep, and the alarm goes off at six o’clock in the morning. The first-year principal runs on fumes.

Sleep is evasive for a first-year principal. Photo by Toa Heftiba on Upsplash.

The Freshman Fifteen

Another life change for a first-year principal is the “Freshman 15.” Just like in college, you gain weight during the freshman year. Well, get ready for 15 or more pounds around the middle. The stress of the job will take its toll on your eating habits and exercise routines. Unfortunately, school administrators rarely have time to sit down and eat lunch. Often, they scarf down their meals in five minutes or grab a bag of chips.  

Eating the wrong types of food, like unhealthy snacks, fast food, sugary drinks, and too much caffeine, causes your body to break down. When you visit the doctor, don’t be surprised that your blood pressure, cholesterol, and sugar levels are out of whack. Don’t get angry when nothing in your closet fits anymore.

Time Management is Your Friend

The third life change for the first-year principal is that your time is no longer your own. Kiss your personal life goodbye. Work starts early and ends late. Sometimes, work never ends for a first-year principal. You don’t know if you’re coming or going. Meetings and events happen before and after school. Eating breakfast or lunch is a luxury. You’re like the Walking Dead. Between no sleep and no time, life as you know it is over.

You must develop a schedule or routine. Otherwise, you will burn out fast. My school secretary was a godsend because she kept me on track, made meeting appointments, and updated the calendar. Each morning, she reminded me of any scheduled events or meetings. The school secretary is a vital person in your life and your first line of defense. 

You’re Always Putting Out Fires

The following life change is you are now a fireman. A first-year principal constantly puts out fires. Throw much of the theory you learned in your leadership courses. Yes, theory matters, but real life hits harder. There’s truth in the trenches. 

Now you’re responsible for a school building with hundreds of students, including staff members and much much more. Theory cannot prepare you for all the stuff that happens daily. Stuff happens all day long. Put on your comfortable shoes and gear. Handle the business and learn to delegate!

Principal Baruti Kafele’s book The Aspiring Principal 50: Critical Questions for Aspiring and New Leaders is a great one to read.

Delegate and Build Relationships

Delegating tasks is essential; however, building relationships is a priority. You will face organizational challenges during your first year as principal and need help tackling everything. Build relationships and trust among staff members so they feel included in the decision-making process. 

Building relationships means getting to know your staff professionally and personally. Learn their skill levels, passions, and what makes them tick. Next, learn to delegate based on what you’ve learned. Keep communication lines open so they feel comfortable discussing their ideas, suggestions, and concerns. Also, share your goals with the staff and be explicit. Remember, you are all in this together.

The Buck Stops with You

One more life change for a first-year principal is that your name is called more than you ever wanted to hear. “Please stop calling my name” is a statement you want to shout to the rooftops. Everyone wants to speak to you about something: the kids, parents, teachers, janitors, school engineers, community members, etc. Your calling card is always full.

Life would be easier if you went to your office and closed the door for peace. However, you can’t hide! Some will even follow you into the bathroom while you do the pee-pee dance. Life as you knew it is over.

Conclusion

Despite the life changes for a first-year principal, it’s an opportunity to learn and change lives. The year is filled with emotions as you acclimate to your new responsibilities. Be sure to take one day at a time. Learning is not an event. It is a process. Your first year as a principal is part of your learning process. It will be overwhelming, and sometimes you may want to quit. Therefore, set goals, adjust as necessary, and stay the course. 

Don’t be discouraged because of the many mistakes you are about to make. Find a mentor! Furthermore, many experienced principals can tell stories of their pitfalls, bad decisions, and more. However, they learned from the errors and kept going. As a first-year principal, don’t be afraid to reach out to the ones that came before you. Congratulations on your new gig!

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Principals are the Lead Relationship Builders

Relationship Builders

School leaders build relationships in their schools. Relationships are a vital part of our personal and professional lives. School buildings are ecosystems filled with children and adults from various walks of life. All look for positive interactions that help shape their school experiences. Educators are encouraged to foster and facilitate positive teacher-student, parent-teacher, and student-student relationships. Where should they begin? It all starts with the leader.

School Leaders Build Relationships

Principals are the lead relationship builders, a role that every school leader has in their list of responsibilities. Although principals are well-known as instructional leaders in their schools, they play various roles in the position. As a leader, you will have various connections, associations, links, or bonds with stakeholders of the school ecosystem.

Schools are the Hubs of Communities

Why are solid and positive relationships meaningful in education? A school often serves as the hub of a community. The building is a safe space for students, parents, and staff. However, it’s not just the physical space of a building that matters; it’s also the human interactions in that space. What goes on among humans in that building is crucial to students’ success.

Let’s explore the relationships that affect stakeholders and how the lead relationship builder can support all of them.

Relationship With Students

First, a principal’s relationship with students is most significant. Without students, there would not be a school. Children need positive, trusting, and supportive connections in their lives. We hope that students come to us with solid and positive familial bonds. However, some come from broken homes and families. They arrive in our schools mistrustful and guarded. 

Build Trust and Healing

The lead relationship builder must model trusting, healing, and supportive interactions for all students. Assure them it is a safe space for all they physically and emotionally bring. Leaders must learn their names and stories. Talk with students one-on-one and discuss issues that matter to them. Be an active listener and also be firm but fair when needed. Building and maintaining strong “developmental relationships” help connect the principal-student connection.

Relationships Between Adults and Students

Developmental relationships between adults and students must include expressing care, challenging growth, providing support, sharing power, and expanding possibilities. Educating yourself as a leader and the staff about developmental relationships requires research and professional learning opportunities. For more information about the developmental relationship frameworks, visit the Search Institute.

Principal-Teacher Relationships

Next, the lead relationship builder must focus on the principal-teacher relationships. Sometimes, the bond between a principal and teachers can be tenuous. Both have high expectations of the other and must realize it takes both to develop successful students. Teachers want trust, support, and to be seen as professionals. It’s a two-way street for all three items. You earn trust over time through merit and actions. Teachers must work to achieve their principal’s confidence and visa-versa. 

Trust Teachers’ Professionalism

School leaders, you must earn their trust, too. Show the teachers that you trust their professionalism and will always be professional. Give teachers the space and support to grow as leaders. Allow staff members to be part of the decision-making process. Show support by providing the resources they need to be successful teachers. Appreciate staff members for their hard work and dedication. Allow them to see your humanness and vulnerability. 

Principal-Parent Relationships

School leaders build relationships with parents. The principal-parent connection is more significant than most realize. Parents can be your greatest allies or your worst enemies. They want respect and what’s best for their children. Being kind and showing your human side invites parents into a comfortable space.

Build Cooperative Relationships with Parents

A principal needs to look for opportunities to build cooperative relationships with parents. Leaders who embrace the chance to build relationships with parents will find it a worthwhile investment. Parents may not always agree with your decisions. Their response and support will be different based on your relationship with them. Still, they may better understand your professional choices if the leader-parent connection is strong. Being trustful and respectful may ease the gap when your decision is incorrect. 

Community Relationships

Community involvement is a good recipe for a successful school. School leaders build relationships with community members. They want to have great schools for children to attend. Developing and building strong relationships with community members, external partners, and agencies is also a priority. Positive connections to the community create success in gaining public support, minimal parent criticisms, and higher student and parent engagement.

Increase Community Support

Whether urban, suburban, or rural, the school is the hub of the community. Strong community connections can help improve student and staff morale, increase community support, build trust, and increase student engagement. As the lead relationship builder, you must find ways to reach out to and engage residents and businesses in the community. Often, many school alums still reside nearby. They have memories and pride in being students. That pride is a valuable tool to support the students and school more.

Conclusion

Principals, leadership is a huge responsibility. The weight is too heavy for many. One way to survive the heaviness is to be the lead relationship builder. By connecting with students, staff, parents, and community members, they can support, lift you and help build a successful school. You must reach your stakeholders and form long-lasting bonds.

Relationship Building Tips

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There is Life After School Leadership

Being a school administrator is tough. The role of a principal or assistant principal requires much stamina. For many, they are overwhelmed, and they teeter on burning out. I see many social media posts of school leaders stating they are ready to walk away due to the overwhelming responsibilities of the job. However, they are afraid to leave because they assume they cannot work in other fields. What they do not know is that there is life after school leadership.

For this post, I created a video to describe some of the career possibilities an administrator can pursue based on their skills. In this video, I speak about my journey when I lost my career as a school principal. Over time and through trials and experience, I realized I had to think outside my box and develop a new mindset. Through the journey, I discovered my life after school leadership.

There is Life After School Leadership

Watch the video to learn more about my life after school leadership.

After watching the video, reflect on your next move as a school leader. Decide what is best for you and your family. Assess all parts of your health, including your mental, physical, and financial well-being. Weigh the pros and cons of your role. Revisit your “why” or purpose to see if it is relevant or has/should it change.

Being miserable, overwhelmed, and highly stressed is not an option. That’s no way to live life personally or professionally. Stay or leave is a big decision, and I understand the fear. However, life decisions are never easy. Take time to think, reflect, rethink, or consult. Always remember, there is life after school leadership.